Proverbs 25:11 A word fitly spoken is like apples of gold in pictures of silver.
On the Bible
On Preachers and Preaching
On Liquor and Drinking
On Dancing, Theater and Other Worldly "Pleasures"
On Religion [True Christianity]
On the Bible
What is culture worth if it is but the whitewash on a rascal? I
would rather be in heaven learning my ABC's than sitting in hell reading
I believe the Bible just as it was written, and I believe that the whale
swallowed Jonah. I would have believed it just the same if it had said
that Jonah swallowed the whale. I've got no better sense than to believe
the Bible. Call me a fool for it, and I'm a happy fool. I believe
every word in the Bible. I accept everything between the lids of the
Book. I have good reasons for my faith.
God Almighty was four hundred years getting up this Book and every want of the universe can be supplied out of this Book. If I had the billions of men of earth before me I would refer them to this precious Book. Here's a blessed balm for every wound, a cure for every ill. Thank God for this precious Book, divinely written and divinely given to save the world.
[Sam Jones was talking about the King James Authorized Version of the Bible
too, we might add. That was the only Bible for him, though others were
available in his day.]
If I understood all about the Bible I'd know somebody wrote it who didn't
have any more sense than I have.
The lawyer that knows as little about pianostone and the Supreme Court reports as the average Christian does about the Bible would never have but one case. The sheriff would be his next client.
1Corinthians 1:21 For after
that in the wisdom of God the world by wisdom knew not God, it pleased God
by the foolishness of preaching to save them that believe.
On Preachers and Preaching
I'd rather be a man than a dignified preacher.
I want to be a good man and a good husband, but God keep me from being a
If I had ten thoBlipnd angels to preach to to-day, every word I should say
would be pure. Our Saviour preached to men. His sermon on the
Mount would not have had so much in it about adultery if He had been preaching
to angels. God keep me dead honest in dealing with souls. I want
to lay my tatter on the rail and aim straight. If I hit you on the side,
I did not mean to hit you there, but right square in the head. If you
think I hit you accidentally, you never made a greater mistake in your life.
I hit you with malice aforethought.
Shall I ask you little dudes and dudines how to preach the gospel?
I once knew a new pastor who, upon taking charge of his church, was met by
a delegation of the deacons previous to delivering his inaugural sermon.
They said: "No, brother, you musn't preach about fashion, because our
fashionable members will be out to hear you. You musn't preach about
dram-drinking or liquor selling, because several of our members who are
liquor-sellers will be out to hear you. you musn't preach about
covetousness, because several of our millionaire members will be out to hear
you." "Well, what can I preach about?" he asked in great perplexity.
"About the Mormons," replied the good deacons; "give'em blazes; there
won't be a Mormon to hear you."
When you think a preacher has got wings you are mistaken.
Now the general pulpit style of America is about like this: "Here I am, Rev.
Jeremiah Jones, D.D., saved by the grace of God with a message to deliver.
If you repent and believe what I believe, you will be saved, but if
you do not, you will be damned, and I don't care much if you are."
[Some things in America haven't changed!]
Whenever you see me with a grubbing-hoe on my shoulder I'm out after grubs,
and if you ain't a grub sit still -- I'm not after you. Do you catch
A great many people object to pointed preaching because it pains them, they
say. This suggests the story of the old lady whose daughter's tooth
ached. She sent for a dentist. he came and pulled out a pair
of big, old-fashioned forceps. The old lady screamed out, "Don't put
them things in my daughter's mouth; pull it out with your fingers!" That
would be mighty nice if it could be done. God bless you all!
if you will let me get the old gospel forceps hold of these teeth, I will
bring them out, but I can not pull them with my fingers. I want that
If any one thinks he can't stand the naked truth rubbed on a little thicker
and faster than he ever had it before, he'd better get out of here.
I am sorry for the preacher that has got so low down in his theology that
he is trying to establish the fact that there is no hell. I know of
men trying to establish the fact that there is no hell. A gentleman
said to me a few days ago that the fact was nearly established. I said
to him: "When did you start your exploring party down there, and when will
they return to report?"
If God will empty your heads and hearts of all the error you have packed
away in them, I will preach enough truth to save you to-night.
At every conference you notice delegations going up to the bishop from the
leading churches. One delegation will got to the bishop and say: "Bishop,
we want you to send us a preacher this year that is popular with the young
people." Another delegation will say: "We want you to send us a preacher
that is popular with other denomination." Another crowd will go in
and say: "Please send us a preacher that in popular with sinners." Another
crowd will say: "Send us a preacher that is popular with everybody." But
I tell you that I never hear of a delegation going up to conference and asking
the bishop to "Please send us a preacher that is popular with God
The devil has no better servant than a preacher who is laying feather-beds
for fallen Christians to light on.
A fellow said to me: "I can raise the devil as well as you can, but I always
get licked." I told him he had better stop. There is no use in
raising the devil if you are going to get licked.
The difference between Christ and the modern preacher is that Christ said, "Follow me," and the preacher says, "Get down there at the altar and agonize."
Romans 1:16 For I am not ashamed of the gospel of Christ: for it is the power of God unto salvation to every one that believeth; to the blip first, and also to the Greek.
Now is the accepted time; now is the day of salvation. When God's
dinner-bell rings all you want is an appetite, and you can walk in and there's
a place for you.
Don't imagine that because you have burned up no meeting-house and killed no preachers you will get in at the fool's door. [speaking of heaven]
James 1:26 If any man among you seem to be
religious, and bridleth not his tongue, but deceiveth
his own heart, this man's religion is vain. 27 Pure religion and undefiled
before God and the Father is this, To visit the fatherless and widows in
their affliction, and to keep himself unspotted from the world.
There is so much sham in this country -- a religion with a brown stone front
and brickbat, mortar and stick back. Let's have a brown-stone religion
Let's make it fashionable to love God and keep His commandments.
Religion is like the measles: if it goes in on you, it will kill you. The
trouble with a great many Christians in this city is, religion has gone in
on them. Keep it broken out on hands, feet and tongue.
There is more religion in laughing than in crying. If religion consists
of crying, I have the best boy in the world.
Old sinners are not satisfied with us unless we live better than they do.
The church of God is the last place to be solemn in, provided you have lived
right. If I have lived a true and upright life, when I meet
Christians I will smile. If I have been swindling widows and dishonoring
my God and myself, when I come to church there will naturally be the solemnity
of the graveyard.
Ignorance is round as a ball and slick as a button; it's got no handle and
you can't manage it.
Foolishness is the stuff what you rub on fools.
Let me say to you: If you can't help but one family in town, let that be the family which needs the help. I have a profound contempt for folks who are always helping those who don't need any help.
Everybody ought to keep good company. There is not an angel in heaven
that would not be corrupted by the company that some of you keep.
The greatest rascals are those who are scrupulously honest. If I see
a man walk across town to pay a nickel, I watch him.
I have known women too poor to own a pair of shoes; but I never knew one
too poor to own a looking-glass.
Many a fellow is praying for rain with his tub turned up-side-down.